You know you’ve been in The Netherlands for too long when

1/ You have a bike

2/ You even know how to brake using retropedaling

3/ Walking from your faculty to the cafeteria has become unimaginable. You take your bike, even if it’s for 50 meters

4/ Eating 7 slides of bread for lunch doesn’t scare you anymore

5/ By the way, you stopped eating warm lunch. You just eat bread

6/ You know what a kroket is, and you learned to avoid the orange ones

7/ It doesn’t surprise you anymore to eat at 18:30

8/ You drink beer

9/ You got used to trance and electro music

10/ You don’t cheat on the train, because controllers are EVERYWHERE

11/ When the cafeteria is crowed, you line up neately with the others

12/ You used to use cash all the time, but now you have a pin card

13/ You think ducks are cute

14/ As soon as the sun pops out, you make a barbecue, even if it’s 10°C outside

15/ You think 15°C is warm

16/ You know winter stops in May, and not March as everywhere else

17/ You don’t remember what a moutain looks like

18/ You still don’t know how to speak Dutch. But your English has improved

19/ You know what Surinam is. And where it is

20/ You never go out without your bike lights

21/ You think butter in a bottle is normal

22/ You know that all the guys are in Delft. And the girls, everywhere else, especially Leiden

23/ You go to Leiden on Saturday

24/ You’ve been to a flower park, and thought it was cool

25/ You’re ok with having only one flavour of ice cream (the white ones)

26/ You don’t even bother to ask “do you speak English?”, you just speak English right away

27/ When you go to the cinema, you are ok with being told where to sit

28/ And you wouldn’t dare sit anywhere else

29/ You have finally accepted the fact that Gouda is cheese

30/ Paying 6€ for a meal in the cafeteria seems normal

31/ You know how to repair a bike

32/ You eat potatoes at least once a day

33/ You always check the weather before leaving home

34/ You know what it is being late and having to wait for a boat to cross the bridge

35/ You can drink milk at any time of the day

36/ Sometimes, you only drink milk as lunch

37/ You have tried karnemelk at least once

38/ You start liking dropjes

39/ For you something sweet means straubwaffels

40/ Spring means flowers blooming and construction sites opening up all over the place

41/ Being tall gets a new meaning

42/ Blonde is back to being a hair-color, not a concept

43/ you have 4 seasons in one day

44/ you can start a mail to your teacher who happens to be a doctor by “yo, wassup doc” (exaggeration can get the message through)

45/ You think that paying to use the toilets is normal.

46/ You know that kapsalon is not a typical turkish dish, but a hairdresser

47/ You start to think that the strange position of the hole in the WC is not that disgusting

48/ You find it easier to find a good joint that a good coffee

49/ You have the AH bonus card

50/ Your windows have no curtains, and you don’t care

51/ If your windows have curtains, you don’t use them, and just don’t care who might be looking at you

52/ For you, light rain is not rain

53/ Professors write a “well done” comment in your assignment and still grade you with a 6

54/ You can drink beer in the cinema (good)

55/ 10°C is warm enough to wear a short or mini skirt

56/ You can ride your bike in the rain, wind and even snow

57/ guys are very cute

58/ you can ride your bike wearing skirt (if you’re a girl), a suit or even high heels (if you’re a girl)

59/ When you start having strong opinion even if you vaguely know the topic

60/ When you “wash” the dishes with soap without rincing them

61/ “alstublieft and dank u wel” are the only dutch words you know

62/ You aren’t surprised anymore that the disco closes at 4 (but it still pisses you off)

63/ You learn to bike without using your hands on the handle

64/ You go to the market and you only buy the stuffs that fit in you bike

65/ Riding a bike and driking coffee/smoking/eating lunch at the same time is not a problem any more

66/ You reformulate the saying “if you drink, don’t drive” by “if you drink, don’t ride”

67/ You’ve been asked where the coffeeshop is

68/ You start wearing orange during soccer events, even when you’re not dutch

69/ You get used not to use napkins when eating. You just eat dirtily.

70/ You know what GVD stands for

71/ You can never predict the weather and can not believe the weather forecast anymore

72/ You wait for the light to go green before crossing the street, even if there is no car

73/ You sometimes eat only with a spoon

74/ You tried fried fish from the caravans at least once

75/ You clap the lecturer (just because he’s been speaking for 2 hours)

76/ You run to Albert Heijn at 21.55 to get some beer for the party that night

77/ Trees planted in straight rows/ aka the forest/ seems normal

78/ You think you understand why they don’t serve coffee at coffeeshops (but you’re not sure yet)

79/ You steal a bike at the station because the night before someone stole yours

80/ You think it is okay to eat multicoloured sprinkels on bread for breakfast

81/ You use 9292ov.nl to go to the supermarket

82/ You know that the wind blows in your face regardless of the direction in which you are biking

83/ You don’t even try to park in an unauthorised area just to ‘pick something up in 5min’, because you know you will get a ticket in 30secondes

84/ When you move out of your apartment, you know you might have to take the floors with you

85/ Stepping in doggiepoo on the sideawalk becomes almost a daily thing

86/ You end up eating super greasy food at 5am at FEBO or ALEV (Delft) Dutch Junk Food

87/ And after that, you manage to bike home still completely wasted and go to class at 8:45

88/ You need an appointement to talk with your friends. Or your mother.

89/ You enjoy making tourists jump off the bike path

90/ You paid more for the lock of your bike than for the bike itselft

91/ Real bread? You’ve made your peace with it. It doesn’t exist

92/ You know that the Netherlands doesn’t have a special dish. They just fry everything

93/ You know getting a couch will be difficult because it doesn’t fit through the door. Windows maybe?

94/ You’re ok spending Queen’s Day in the train because people are walking on the rails

95/ Yap, Joost and Jeroen are the names of most of the Dutch guys you know

96/ when the sun pops up all your Dutch friends are wearing beach flip flops

97/ Dutch people ask you why don’t you speak Dutch?

98/ You still don’t speak Dutch but watch silly Dutch TV shows like Take me out and Single

99/ You have been in a relationship with at least one Dutch person

100/ You are used to people bumping into you abruptly on the street, yet never saying sorry

tirado daqui